This weekend was the first time, since I moved back to the city for school, that i’ve been home alone for more than hour. I’m really grateful that I had that time alone. I spent a lot of time thinking, especially today while out walking and listening to music.  I say all the time that I’m always in my own little world, thinking about other things, not really paying attention. I daydream alot. What will my life be like in 10 years? Where will I live? Will I have the same friends? Normal things that people my age thinking about.  I really have no idea where I will be in 10 years, most people plan out goals, things they wish to achieve in that amount of time. I’ve sat down many, many times and tried to write down 10 year goals. I can never think of anything. I feel like there are so many variables in my life, that anything can change in an instant. And honestly, I’m not even sure what I want from life.  I’d like to live in New York, if only for a little while. I want to experience a complete 180 from what I’m used to. Or maybe LA, someplace where it’s busy, nosiy, loud, full of concrete and people who don’t give a fuck.  On the other hand I have this nagging voice in my head telling me I’ll never get to New York, it’s not possible because who do I think I am? I’m from this teeny town in this tiny province. I’m not rolling in money, not even close. What makes me special enough to actually live out my dreams? I have to try and fight the voice, its hard. So very hard. photograph by me, this is my backyard in my hometown.

This weekend was the first time, since I moved back to the city for school, that i’ve been home alone for more than hour. I’m really grateful that I had that time alone. I spent a lot of time thinking, especially today while out walking and listening to music. 

I say all the time that I’m always in my own little world, thinking about other things, not really paying attention. I daydream alot. What will my life be like in 10 years? Where will I live? Will I have the same friends? Normal things that people my age thinking about. 

I really have no idea where I will be in 10 years, most people plan out goals, things they wish to achieve in that amount of time. I’ve sat down many, many times and tried to write down 10 year goals. I can never think of anything. I feel like there are so many variables in my life, that anything can change in an instant. And honestly, I’m not even sure what I want from life. 

I’d like to live in New York, if only for a little while. I want to experience a complete 180 from what I’m used to. Or maybe LA, someplace where it’s busy, nosiy, loud, full of concrete and people who don’t give a fuck. 

On the other hand I have this nagging voice in my head telling me I’ll never get to New York, it’s not possible because who do I think I am? I’m from this teeny town in this tiny province. I’m not rolling in money, not even close. What makes me special enough to actually live out my dreams?

I have to try and fight the voice, its hard. So very hard.

photograph by me, this is my backyard in my hometown.

(Source: hollywoodbeat)

(by abbytrysagain)

(by abbytrysagain)

shotguneyes: If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense. Nothing would be what it is because everything would be what it isn’t. And contrary-wise; what it is it wouldn’t be, and what it wouldn’t be, it would. You see?

shotguneyes:

If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense. Nothing would be what it is because everything would be what it isn’t. And contrary-wise; what it is it wouldn’t be, and what it wouldn’t be, it would. You see?

[Flash 9 is required to listen to audio.]

breathtaking:

Helena Beat | Foster The People

Sometimes life, it takes you by the hand; it puts you down before you know it it’s gone and you’re dead again.

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